Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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