please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
