I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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