my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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