Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
