the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
