Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Randomize
