I like my sex mixed with concussions.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
