Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize