girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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