He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
