Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
