How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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