Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
