I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
do herpes really smell.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Randomize
