We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
this beer tastes like vomit already
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Randomize
