Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
