her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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