I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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