I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
