Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
