Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
This toilet bowl is my home.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
