she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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