Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I supernannyed him into submission
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
