At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
