Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
