Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
