I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
