Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
How does one acquire holy water?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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