I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
