after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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