Me too!
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
