Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
