She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Randomize
