I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
