but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
