shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
