so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
