it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Randomize
