What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
