Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize