Already got asked if we're dating
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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