How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I wish you could order shots online.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
