you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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