I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize