Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
