After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
