i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
