Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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