you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
